Have you ever felt like you shouldn’t feel a certain way?
I have. More times than I can remember OR count.
Most recently, I was getting irritated with Brandon for not noticing my feelings. He was working later than I thought he should be, doing things that I didn’t feel were important, and overall, I was just frustrated. I felt like the things I wanted to do were always taking a backseat. While I was stewing about it, I talked myself out of being really upset- because Brandon does work really hard for our family so I don’t have to. I talked myself out of feeling sad and upset, but I really did have a point. So why did I feel the need to “back out” of how I really felt?
I think as humans, it’s normal to get caught up in the day to day and whatever isn’t making us immediately happy, is making us feel neglected and unloved– even though that’s not the case. It’s not that Brandon doesn’t love me or that he is intentionally trying to make me unhappy. I just perceive it differently. This was something I really had to work on when I was struggling with my anxiety. It was hard at first to express my emotions, because I felt that I shouldn’t be feeling that way. I shouldn’t have been worried if the house was going to burn down when I left, or if Brandon didn’t answer his phone that he HAD to have been in a car accident. However, that WAS how I was feeling, right or wrong, and being able to have those close to me acknowledge that instead of brushing it under a rug was a defining moment in that journey.
Think about these few phrases “boys don’t cry” or “pull yourself together”. It’s no wonder that we have a hard time owning up to what we are feeling because we are taught that it’s not acceptable. Feelings are reactions to circumstances, so who is to say WHAT we should feel for every circumstance?
Owning our feelings and expressing them despite what others say is a huge part of accepting ourselves. Its OK to be angry, scared, hurt, sad, or disappointed. Sharing WHY you feel a certain way is another step in owning and loving your feelings.
While I am no expert (because I really struggle with this), I encourage you to start embracing your feelings and expressing them. You may find that a weight has been lifted off your shoulders!
linking up with the Hearts at Home bloggers!
If you are thinking about attending the Hearts at Home National Conference this year, the registration deadline and early bird discount is still valid through tomorrow, February 21. For more information on the conference OR to register, click HERE. I have gone the last 3 years and I highly recommend it!
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